Tuesday, 10 February 2009

Canada's Next Top Model

On a message board that I frequent, a woman named Emma posted a picture of herself posing in front of what looked a panel of judges, as shown below. The following transcript is real, even though it has since been deleted by the woman in question. Props to Brian Harvey for providing several of the funny questions in this exchange:

Addman at 15:26, on 10 February
Tiny picture. Got any bigger ones?

Emma Bayard-Aikman at 15:31, on 10 February
the one right before...cirque du soleil

Addman at 15:34, on 10 February
Are you an aspiring model? I am in the modelling business, perhaps I can get you some work.

Emma Bayard-Aikman at 15:34, on 10 February
i would love that!!!

Addman at 15:37, on 10 February
I work for Models Direct. We're an agency that prides ourselves on providing the highest quantity of models available. We take on a wide range of people that we feel have that certain X Factor. Here's our website:


I can set up a profile for you if you want to go ahead. If you like, I can ask you the entry questions here and create you an online portfolio this afternoon.

Emma Bayard-Aikman at 15:42, on 10 February
sounds good

Addman at 15:43, on 10 February
Ok, that's great. Well name and gender are a given (lol), but could I have your date of birth?

Emma Bayard-Aikman at 15:44, on 10 February
10 / 10 / 88

Addman at 15:45, on 10 February
Perfect! And your nationality?

Emma Bayard-Aikman at 15:47, on 10 February
canadian 100%

Addman at 15:50, on 10 February
Good stuff. Canadian eh? I don't think we have many of those on our books. Now, the next few questions are a bunch of fun ones to get a feel for your personality and give a light hearted take on your profile, so don't feel put off ok?

Are you more of a cat person or a dog person?

Emma Bayard-Aikman at 15:52, on 10 February
cat person...

Addman at 15:52, on 10 February
Could you describe your wildest night out?

Emma Bayard-Aikman at 15:59, on 10 February
do you really want to know???? lol good question.

Addman at 16:01, on 10 February
Ideally, yes. If it's too risque or you don't feel comfortable telling me, you can always skip any dirty details :)

Emma Bayard-Aikman at 16:02, on 10 February
i like to party , although i dont go out every night. im not a big drinker either because i usually drive... wildest night.. studying with my cat till 3 am. is that wild enough for you???

Addman at 16:14, on 10 February
Good answer. Sorry about the amount of time it's taken me to get back to you, my browser just crashed.

Who would win out of a fight? Zangeif or Dhalsim?

Emma Bayard-Aikman at 16:17, on 10 February
Zangeif... lol not too sure who that is ...but.. he would win!

Addman at 16:17, on 10 February
Too right he would!

Do you have one leg shorter than the other?

Emma Bayard-Aikman at 16:19, on 10 February
no...not that i know of...llol

Addman at 16:20, on 10 February
Is your glass half full, half empty, or shattered in a puddle of despair that is soaking into the desolate floorboards of your anguish?

Emma Bayard-Aikman at 16:21, on 10 February
would you mind doing this by sending messages...

Emma Bayard-Aikman at 16:21, on 10 February
half full always.

Addman at 16:23, on 10 February
We are sending messages, are we not?

Short bangs, or long, hard bangs?

Emma Bayard-Aikman at 16:24, on 10 February
lol... that i have or would like to have? long hard bangs..

Addman at 16:25, on 10 February
Could you describe your ideal man/woman/other?

Emma Bayard-Aikman at 16:27, on 10 February
tall ...dark hair and skin complexion.... smart .... and did i say smart???

Addman at 16:28, on 10 February
Do you wear short shorts?

Emma Bayard-Aikman at 16:29, on 10 February

Addman at 16:36, on 10 February
Since you're a cat lover, do you have a nice pussy?

And that's where the exchange ends. Oddly enough, she's left the comments about me wanting her to join the modelling agency, but deleted the silly questions.

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