This is a continuation post in the saga of Benji, the hoodie scammer. To sum up the last post, he attempted to use a group of mine to advertise his business, so I decided to see how long I could string him along for.
Shortly after our previous exchange, Benji added me as a friend and tried to talk to me via IM. The exchange suddenly became livlier and required me to think on my feet, causing Benji to question my integrity a couple of times, but I'm quite pleased with how this turned out:
11:41amBenjy
hello
Eight it is then.
What file are these emails stored in? Its something we could look at.
Could you send out and event? or post a link and a small note explaining how we intend to generate money for charity on your??
11:42amAddman
I can make a link on my group. What kind of thing would you like it say?
I can make it say all sorts of things
11:43amBenjy
i can have a think about that then send that to you
what about a fund rasisng event?!
11:45amBenjy
do have a mobile that i can call you on?
11:46amAddman
I'm afraid my mobile is in need of a replacement, so no, just the land line at the moment I'm afraid.
Never trust a dog to fetch your phone when it rings
11:46amBenjy
wise words there
from your group you can send an event out cant you.
11:47amAddman
Oh I see, yes I can, and people can see it and join and write all sorts of stuff all over it
11:48amBenjy
indeed! you could set one of those up
11:48amAddman
What kind of event should I make? How about 2% off all hoodies event, in aid of Hoodies
11:48amBenjy
send it to m e 1st and i can approve it
11:48amAddman
Alright, I'll brainstorm some ideas and let you know
1st idea: Hoodies for dogs. Dog hoodies than are semi permeable and let in water
11:49amBenjy
if they join my group @the hoody company.com' they get 10% off
if they quote your reference say ' Saras hoodies' the hoody organiser will get a free hoody and 25p will go to your charity
11:50amAddman
That's a fantastic promotion, but I don't understand how that money will get into my bank, or how much 10% of 25p is
11:52amBenjy
yes agreed
once its up and running then u give me ur bank details
11:52amAddman
Right ok, what details will you need from me when this is all up and running?
11:53amBenjy
acc number and sor code
*sort
We need to get this working 1st!!
11:53amAddman
Right ok then, I'll go to the bank this afternoon and get those details ready for you. I'll say "Give me the details for Benji!" and they will shiver in fright.
Yes, yes we do, this is grave business
I've just had an idea for the event!
11:54amBenjy
ill think of something to add to your group page. whats the idea you have?
11:54amAddman
How about a "Best hoodie against peadophillia" contest?
11:55amBenjy
hmmm not so sure
lets both have a barin storm
11:55amAddman
I think my idea is a sure fire winner
11:55amBenjy
i have to go to a meeting now but will be back about 2. you can show me what you have then
11:55amAddman
Ok then Benjy, I'll think up some fantastic ideas and let you know. Even though I think we should go with my hoodies for paedophiles one.
11:56amBenjy
do you have a 'sarahs law' logo?
11:56amAddman
Yes, I'll fish it out and give it you
11:57amBenjy
what charity will it go to?
11:57amAddman
The Foundation Against Roaming Paedophiles And Protection Of Molestation From Adults
11:58amBenjy
ok
11:58amAddman
Benji I've been thinking about that brainstorm and I think that a contest would be the best type of event to hold. One about Sarah and how much she hates those rascally paedophiles.
11:59amBenjy
are you serious?
11:59amAddman
Of course!
12:01amBenjy
well think about it and let me know when i get back
12:10amAddman
Benjy, I just rang the bank. They said I shouldn't trust you and that you are a shifty, immoral person. Is this true?
12:10amBenjy
of course not
who said this?
12:11amAddman
Benjy, you're testing my patience here. The bank said you don't even care about Sarah's Law and only want to make profits from hoodies!
12:11amBenjy
are you serious?
12:12amAddman
They said you also sold your dog to an unscrupulous peasant who may/may not have raped it and eaten it.
I don't know where they get their information, but I've got no reason to not believe them.
12:15amBenjy
fuck off!!!
Benji is offline
12:16amAddman
Hold me!
It's difficult to see at exactly what point you delivered the back-breaking straw to the Benji-camel.
ReplyDeleteHa! Disappointing to see Benjy take off at the first sign of danger, but it's still a pretty satisfying end. Well done, Addman :)
ReplyDeleteI believe that his sign off was a little rude. Maybe he is ashamed of his decision to sell his dog to a peasant. I'm not sure why, it's not like he raped and ate the dog or anything.
ReplyDeleteHe should have done a background check on the unscrupulous peasant just to see how unscrupulous he really was.
P.S. Wise decision on the 8 gerbils