Friday 16 May 2014

Shark Life

Here's a little ditty to celebrate our brave and fearless lifeguards.  The original song can be heard here:



Confidence is a preference for the habitual voyeur of what is known as (sharklife)
A morning bloodbath can be avoided if you wear a suit made of chain mail for what is known as (sharklife)
John's got intimidated while trying to feed the swordfish they love a bit of it (sharklife)
Who's that rowing out too far? You should try jumping in there mate, get some exercise!

[Chorus]
ALL THE LIFEGUARDS
SO MANY LIFEGUARDS
THEY ALL GO HAND IN HAND
HAND IN HAND THROUGH THEIR SHARKLIFE

I get up when I want except on Wednesdays when I get rudely awakened by a shark warning
(sharklife)
I put my speedos on, have a cup of tea and I think about leaving the beach house (sharklife)
I feed the Great Whites I sometimes feed the Hammerheads too it gives me a sense of enormous well
Being (sharklife)
And then I'm happy for the rest of the day safe in the knowledge they are far too full to try and kill me (sharklife)

[Chorus]
ALL THE LIFEGUARDS
SO MANY LIFEGUARDS
THEY ALL GO HAND IN HAND
HAND IN HAND THROUGH THEIR SHARKLIFE

It's got nothing to do with your great sailing technique you know
And it's not about you waterskiers who go round and round and round
Sharklife (sharklife)

12 comments:

  1. If you haven't already, you should get this recorded. Parody songs are huge and that was fun.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yeah, but Weird Al threatened to cut me for muscling in on his turf.

      Delete
  2. Will there be a follow up single about the toilet habits of insects........ *wait for it*...... BEETLE BUM! ahahahahahahahahahhahaha.

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    Replies
    1. Very good. Then I'll do one about going down a one way street called There's No Other Way.

      I wish Blur were still releasing new so we could make jokes like this. Why did the 90's end?

      Delete
  3. I'm with Mark. I'll pin down the beat with my trusty kazoo, if you agree to throw down the vocals. Hopefully one of your followers knows how to play a church organ or a triangle.

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    Replies
    1. Are you kidding? I'm setting a quintet accordian group to lay down some phat riddims over my shizzle.

      Delete
  4. DAMN I have always thought he said Sharp Knife . . . . So Sharklife is good with me . . . . Ooooo I do have a huge Hammond organ in the garage, several guitars and recording equipment and play some mean african drums.

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    Replies
    1. Yes but can you play them all at once? Because I can't play any, so I'll have to rely on you.

      Delete
  5. Ooh, if you need a brass section, I can blow a horn. You know, a French horn...nope, no matter how I put it, it still sounds as though I'm offering up my services...which I am...as a musician naturally. (and this is why I should never post a comment at 2 am)

    This did fair make me giggle Mr A.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Y'know, if lifeguards were serious about their jobs, they would feed the sharks until they were full. But I guess attracting sharks to a place they know where they can get a free meal adds an element of danger. What fun is ocean swimming without that sense of danger?

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    Replies
    1. It would give people some nice exercise.

      Delete

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