Friday 30 May 2014

Get Twitter Singing

I've always wanted to teach the world to sing, in perfect harmony.  Failing that, I'll teach the world to spit filthy rap lyrics while they bounce through a car wash on hydraulics.  It's a simple dream of mine, to bring music to the masses without having an ounce of musical talent myself.  That's why I started ripping off song lyrics and posting them on Twitter.

Using my Twitter alias, Ollie The Pigeon, I have begun spitting phat rhymes into the Internet ether.  Hopefully it will catch on and we'll all sit around campfires singing these songs.  Perhaps we'll have peace on Earth someday and I can claim full responsibility for it.































Not technically a song, but a job opportunity for Snoop Dog/Lion/Bobcat:




And this is one is more of a confession:




Please join my movement by following me on Twitter:

@Olliethepigeon

 The results of the 400th post contest will be posted on Monday.

12 comments:

  1. I was kind of hoping you were going to bring up our back-and-forth Dr. Dre rap battle. Also, I'm a little suspect of any city if their number one brag is that "the grass is green." Nice try Paradise or Vatican City.

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    Replies
    1. Monday's post (the lawyer who represented all the gangsters in a court of law) was solely dedicated to our rap battle. Also, it was too deep in my Twitter feed to retrieve. I might see if I can edit it in when I get time.

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    2. Nice. I wanted to figure out an angle to turn that exchange into a post, but couldn't get to anything I wasn't ashamed at having written. (Don't get me wrong, I'm ashamed by everything I write, but it usually takes a couple of hours and isn't instantaneous like these ideas were.)

      Delete
  2. Those are brilliant. I don't know about the crowdfunding project though. I can see that one not going down so well. Which is a shame because that would be just so damn beautiful. Especially if it's a rap musical. Don't forget The Happenin' Diary of Anne Phranke.

    "Yo what's up it's your boy Notorious H.I.T and I'm here with my mothafuckin' Nazis. We won't hurt you see, as long as you give us that chick A double N E."

    I'm burning in Hell for that.

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    Replies
    1. Then I'm burning in hell with you. That was hilarious.

      Delete
  3. I'd pitch that idea to Snoop Dog. If Reading Raindow's Resurrection can get a million dollars in funding in less than 12 hours, there's no way Fo' Shizzler's List can do it. Maybe you can recreate all the WWII movie greats: Raidin' Pirate Ryans, Hollerin' Outta Iwo Jima, Dat Boot, Dat Boy Wit' Dem Striped PJs.

    And for my attempt:
    Coffee beans are not my lover, give me a swirl and I'll shoot off like a gun. It goes well with a honey bun.

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    Replies
    1. I would pay real money to watch Dat Boot. I hope it gets a sequel calles Dat Booty.

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  4. Those are good very good. . . .I sort of gave up with twitter, I would say hello to celebs and be nice and they would treat us ordinary folk like we were just ordinary folk. Even worse they would pretend ordinary folk do not exist, so I left and returned to blogging where I can sing your songs and smile at seagulls and dance naked in the chocolate factory at night. . .

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    Replies
    1. That explains why I found strange short hairs in my wispa gold the other day. For the sake of our chocolate, please come back to Twitter.

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  5. I always used to think that on 'La Isla Bonita' Madonna was singing, 'Last night I dreamt of some bagels.'
    Is it shameful to admit that I was singing each of those out loud at 2 in the morning? Thought so.

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    Replies
    1. Not at all. Bagels are delicious and there is a disturbing lack of songs about them. You were just trying to restore the balance.

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  6. I added you on twitter.

    Can you start a twitter beef with somebody? Maybe 50 Cent, because I hear he's not very good with words.

    Kanye's too obvious.

    If we want to go outside of hip hop, Alec Baldwin seems like he might be fun. I mean, you know you'll keep your cool longer than he will...

    ReplyDelete

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