The general public is often busy for up to 93% of their waking life, the comprehensive survey concluded, with the busiest hours being between 9:00AM and 5:00PM. These busy periods often occur during weekdays.
“I find that I am usually busy when I am at work” said Bob Lager, a refuse disposal technician from Dagenham. “But then when I get home I have to take the bins out, and sometimes help a child with maths homework. I mean, shouldn’t they be teaching that kind of thing in school? I’m far too busy for that.”
It is claimed that many Britons are even busy on bank holidays and during days off. Laundry, visiting elderly burdens (or relatives), and mundane sexual duties are amongst the top chores people are subjected to.
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| Typical British work |
Even stay at home parents are finding themselves immersed in an increasingly busy lifestyle. Despite being previously thought of as slovenly babysitters who eat Pringles for breakfast and update their Facebook status all day long about the latest Jeremy Kyle revelations, it turns out that these people are also rather busy. Changing soiled nappies and nipping to the shops are all highly rated activities.
“I find that I am just too busy to talk to people” said Lauren Magnum, a mother of two in Kettering. “I’m the busiest busybody in the history of busy”
9 out of 10 people surveyed said they were “too busy” to complete a simple questionnaire about how busy they are.
A government spokesperson tried to deny and suppress the scientific findings. “It’s all relative. Sometimes people say they’re busy as an excuse to get out of something. Sometimes they’ll say they’re busy when they don’t have 10 hours a day to snooze and play video games. Sometimes people claim to be busy so as not to appear lazy amongst their peers. This research proves nothing.”
As a contrast, we found a man who claims to not be very busy at all. Adam Gardner says “to be honest, I can’t recall the last time I was busy. I don’t think I’ve ever been busy at all in my life.”
I could write more about this, but frankly, I’m just too darned busy. I’ve got to take the dog for a walk, then think about my next toilet trip. I am one busy motherfucker!
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Thank you all for your wonderfully polite and civilised suggestions for the 200th post. I am now closing submissions, which will hopefully give me enough time to write the damn thing. In all fairness, you've all come up with fantastic entries and I hope the results will not disappoint.
There's a lot of white lines I am looking at. Is this what's inside a Brits mind?
ReplyDeleteYeah, sorry! Blogger has been doing that lately. It keeps formatting my text with a white background, even though it looks OK on the preview. I think I've sorted the problem now, so hopefully all will be well.
DeleteI'd comment but I'm too busy. (I also hate myself for making that dumb, obvious joke.)
ReplyDeleteFor the most part, I agree with busy being used as an excuse. Sometimes I tell myself I'm too busy to give myself an excuse for not doing things like clean my apartment.
Me too. Only replace the word "apartment" with "bodily hair".
DeleteI'm too busy to leave a thoughtful comment, so I'll only say "I concur!"
ReplyDeleteI'm so busy I'm even busy when I'm sleeping. We've no time to dream, brain, I have at LEAST 4 more things that need doing before morning!
I can't say that I'm ever busy in my sleep. Sometimes I "get busy" when I'm asleep, which is why we always have to buy new pillowcases.
DeleteI was too busy to read this, but I'm sure it was a good post.
ReplyDeleteMimicking everyone else, I am also too busy to leave a witty comment. I have to take out the dog. Then, I have to take in the dog. Then, I have to remove his leash. Then, he's most likely going to want a pat on the head. Yikes, what am I doing wasting time?!
You better get to it. That dog will be busy licking his balls later.
DeleteI have spent many a happy hour making up things to do to avoid the pitfalls of ending up busy. It has come to my notice that when busy people finally stop being busy and rest inevitably something happens to them. They get ill, go mad, or get bored, so not being busy is a skill and I am rather good at it.
ReplyDeleteMust go as I have nothing to do
I know what you mean. I've also come across people who suddenly get ill when they finally stop being busy. Perhaps if you can perfect the art of unbusyness, you can achieve immortality.
DeleteI was almost too busy to comment but then Big Brother came on...
ReplyDeleteI realised the other day that Big Brother is still on the air. That event coincided with the day I finally called the Samaritans for help.
DeleteLol! I'd say I was busy too, but that'd be a dirty rotten lie.
ReplyDeleteIndeed. I reckon that, if there's something you really wanted to do, or someone you really wanted to see, you'd make time. Being busy is often an excuse, or a lack of effort.
DeleteAs parent, I take great umbrage in what you have written. As I wiped away from my mouth, the last vestiges of the Pringles that I had for breakfast, your lies about our busyness had me so incensed, that after watching the great god that is Jeremy Kyle, I had to update upon the 'Book Of Face,' my ire at your outrageous musings. Now excuse me, I have to nip off to the shops before they close.
ReplyDeleteOh hi Lily! I wasn't...erm. I mean...erm. Obviously this doesn't apply to you.
DeleteGreat post :)
I'm too busy to comment.
ReplyDeleteThat's a shame. I was looking forward to reading a comment from you. Maybe next time.
DeleteLuckily I got a job just in the nick of time thus avoiding all the busy pitfalls of a stay-at-home-layabout-doing-nothing-all-day-pringle-eating-Kyle-watching-mum. Now I am just tooooo toooo busy to read blogs about being busy and definitely tooooo toooo busy to comment. So there!
ReplyDeleteYou'll just have to quit your job. It's the only solution.
DeleteI keep thinking I'll be less busy next week but it's always more of the same.
ReplyDeleteAhh well, maybe it'll calm down next week.
DeleteI have found there is a direct correlation between the boredom/anxiety caused by any given task multiplied by the time spent performing the duty itself compared with the amount of time spent creating menial things to do in order to subjugate the completion of the job in hand.
ReplyDeleteThis equation can, in some instances, cause a paradoxical effect on a subjects localized space-time, resulting in the perceived passage of linear time to expand exponentially once the said task has begun.
i now need a little lie down before i do the washing up....
Bloody hell, did you come up with that in your free time? Wait, I forgot, you don't have any.
DeleteI sent you an email. Let me know if you received it because my mail has been acting goofy lately. Feel free to delete this comment as well.
ReplyDeleteNope, not got it. Can you resend?
DeleteOkay, resent it as two emails. I gave you two posts to choose from. Let me know how it goes.
DeleteHm. After reading this post, I suddenly feel less bad about having been busy lately.
ReplyDelete-Barb the French Bean